Yesterday I got to pick up Vash from daycare.
Yay!
Except for he was tired and didn't seem all that thrilled to see me.
Boo.
Since we're back on standard time, it was getting dark already, and as I was carrying him out to the car another mom was walking to her car with her toddler. He was upset about something.
I heard the mom explain, "when the sun goes down then the moon comes up."
Turns out her son was upset that the sun went away.
"But I don't want the sun to go down! I want the sun up!"
"Well, there's nothing we can do about that."
Ain't that the truth.
Sometimes, no matter how much we want something to be different than it is, there's just nothing we can do about that.
It's as simple as that.
Friday, November 8, 2013
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
This Boy is 6 Months Old!
This. Boy. He melts my heart on a consistent basis. He is such a chill dude and we love him!
We went to the ever-popular Foto Fly to get his 6 month pictures taken last week. Let me tell you, there is a reason they are popular! We had a really great experience and I will definitely be going back. Just check out the pictures! Trying to figure out which one(s) to print and hang at home and take to work is nearly impossible.
At 6 months this kid is:
Sitting up like a champ.
Babbling. I'm fond of the "ma, ma" sound myself. :) However "ba, ba" is very cute as well.
Finally sleeping in his crib in his own room.
Sleeping through the night, most nights.
Through his first month at daycare and seems to like it.
Just getting started on solid foods. So far only applesauce and he seems to like it.
Rolls over from tummy to back and back to tummy.
Can rotate on his belly 360 degrees.
Pushes up with his arms and gets his belly off the ground.
Just about out-grown his size 2 diapers.
Likes to chew on cloth.
Loving his diaper changes still. (We're pretty sure he'll be the toddler who runs around naked)
Wearing anywhere from size 3-9 months clothes. 9 month pajamas for sure, some 3 month onesies and then a bunch of 6 month pants and shirts.
Starting to get an attachment to his blanket.
He occasionally will push up to his hands and knees for a second, and sometimes that makes him scoot backwards. So he's slowly become more mobile and figuring all that out. He's so much fun to have around.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Baby's First Road Trip!
So we'll just pretend like all the posts I've imagined in my head have actually been published and move on. Sound good?
To sum up, my baby is now 4 (and a half on Tuesday!) months old. He is seriously the thing our world revolves around. And not just because he is still 100% dependent on us for his survival. :) He is starting to giggle, he has rolled over several times from tummy to back and is getting so close to going the other way.
Moving on.
We took our first road trip last week! To none other than the Happiest Place on Earth!
We weren't sure how it was going to go with the baby. Vash seems to have a love/hate relationship with the car and his car seat. Remy was more nervous about it than I was. -Not that I was so confident it would be easy or anything. I think it turned out about as I expected. He really was a trooper and usually only had one semi-fussy segment each way.
Though having a baby that still eats every 2 hours during the day DID make the trip a bit longer. Like 4-5 hours longer...oy! But we made it and like I said, he really was a trooper! It could have been a LOT worse.
We had so much fun. My whole family was there at the park already when we got there (they also came a day earlier and left a day later than we did), and everyone was super excited to see Vash. I think Vash was just happy to not be in a car seat!
First item of business was to get the group picture in front of the Mickey flowers.
Second item of business...check out the baby center! For those of you who don't know, Disneyland has this awesome place called the Baby Center at the end of Main Street right next to the Plaza Inn. There is also one in California Adventure behind Cars Land next to the Ghirardelli Chocolate place.
You want to go there.
Trust me.
Especially if you are nursing/pumping. You go in and they have an area partitioned off with nice chairs to nurse. An area to pump. High chairs for feeding older babies. A kitchen to warm bottles and wash stuff and make food. Nice changing tables. Even a big sink with a flusher for all you cool cloth diaper users (or for washing clothes in the event of a blow out...not that we know from experience or anything). Oh and don't forget the toddler potties. Oh and the baby supplies they sell in case you loose a binky, need a diaper, baby food, etc. Oh, and the nicest employees you ever did meet.
Did I mention it's air conditioned?
Yeah.
So anyhow, if you are going to make a trip to Disneyland, do yourself a favor and don't forget to check it out. I just dropped by to see what it was all about and they gave me a little tour and run-down of everything.
The first ride we all went on was the Haunted Mansion. Why? Because it's long-ish, cool, and the line was short. Vash didn't seem to mind it at all! Though looking back I would have picked something that wasn't so dark. I don't think he could really see much. Oops. :)
Then we went on Pirates. Still fun. Didn't mind the hills. But it was passed feeding time and half way through he started crying. I felt super bad for the other people in the boat, but oh well. I was hoping he would just fall asleep, but that didn't happen until we were about to get off. Figures.
We were lucky enough to find Mickey on our way out of Disneyland! Vash didn't seem to care one way or the other. But I think he was eyeing that big nose to see how he could get it in his mouth. :) Also I was so grateful to find out the nice worker took some candid shots of his first introduction to Mickey. I had no idea she was taking those!
We also got Vash his first Mickey ears. They are miniature and so funny! We thought we'd save the legit ones for when they fit him a little better. He seriously got so many "oohs" and "aaahs" and we walked around.
Next we headed over to California Adventure for some dinner.
That pretty much sums up our first day. We left right after dinner since that baby hadn't napped all day!
We stayed at the Del Sol which is literally across the street from the entrance. And even better than that...it's right next to a Cold Stone. :) We decided to try out this carrier (I think Vash was too little when we tried it before and didn't like it much) to see if it was worth taking to the park. Vash LOVED IT!! WIN! And I'm pretty sure Dad loved carrying him even more.
The next day we all headed out to Huntington Beach. Love that beach!
We wanted to get Vash's toes wet in the ocean, but apparently the tide was dropping or the waves were just small because every time we set him down the water would never quite come up to reach his feet so we kept scooting up.
Well, we scooted a little too far and when the next wave came, it was a little stronger than we expected so the water rushed up to his knees. The poor kid was NOT happy.
As demonstrated in the face below.
That just set him off and he could not be consoled. Seriously, he cried like he cries when he gets his shots. I felt bad, but geez. A little dramatic if you ask me. :)
We all went to eat at Ruby's at the end of the pier. That place was freaking adorable and more importantly delicious! And even more important than THAT, the walk put my baby to sleep. So sweet! He got lots of attention from all the people on the pier. :)
Since we were all dressed for water, we decided to have Vash try out the pool. He likes his baths a lot and this pool was actually pretty warm so we were pretty sure he would like it....
And he did!
I'm pretty sure he could have floated in there all day. Well, if he didn't start getting cold anyway. He looked so relaxed! The floaty was from my mom and it was perfect for him. It even had a little canopy, but we didn't need it this time.
The last day at Disney Remy and I finally got to go on a few rides too. I had been to Disneyland twice while I was pregnant and was itchin' to finally get to ride the new Cars Land racers as well as my all time fave, Indy.
We had a really good time, the boy was good on the way home and we were actually able to shorten the drive home by an hour or so which was nice. As Remy put it, Disneyland is definitely a different monster with a baby. But still so fun!
To sum up, my baby is now 4 (and a half on Tuesday!) months old. He is seriously the thing our world revolves around. And not just because he is still 100% dependent on us for his survival. :) He is starting to giggle, he has rolled over several times from tummy to back and is getting so close to going the other way.
Moving on.
We took our first road trip last week! To none other than the Happiest Place on Earth!
We weren't sure how it was going to go with the baby. Vash seems to have a love/hate relationship with the car and his car seat. Remy was more nervous about it than I was. -Not that I was so confident it would be easy or anything. I think it turned out about as I expected. He really was a trooper and usually only had one semi-fussy segment each way.
Loading up the car!
Our little driver.
And NO the car wasn't on! Geez! We had to pull off at Mona for our first feeding.
Now that Fuddruckers is no longer in Utah, we have to make a stop in Vegas to get our fix!
Though having a baby that still eats every 2 hours during the day DID make the trip a bit longer. Like 4-5 hours longer...oy! But we made it and like I said, he really was a trooper! It could have been a LOT worse.
We had so much fun. My whole family was there at the park already when we got there (they also came a day earlier and left a day later than we did), and everyone was super excited to see Vash. I think Vash was just happy to not be in a car seat!
Second item of business...check out the baby center! For those of you who don't know, Disneyland has this awesome place called the Baby Center at the end of Main Street right next to the Plaza Inn. There is also one in California Adventure behind Cars Land next to the Ghirardelli Chocolate place.
You want to go there.
Trust me.
Especially if you are nursing/pumping. You go in and they have an area partitioned off with nice chairs to nurse. An area to pump. High chairs for feeding older babies. A kitchen to warm bottles and wash stuff and make food. Nice changing tables. Even a big sink with a flusher for all you cool cloth diaper users (or for washing clothes in the event of a blow out...not that we know from experience or anything). Oh and don't forget the toddler potties. Oh and the baby supplies they sell in case you loose a binky, need a diaper, baby food, etc. Oh, and the nicest employees you ever did meet.
Did I mention it's air conditioned?
Yeah.
So anyhow, if you are going to make a trip to Disneyland, do yourself a favor and don't forget to check it out. I just dropped by to see what it was all about and they gave me a little tour and run-down of everything.
The first ride we all went on was the Haunted Mansion. Why? Because it's long-ish, cool, and the line was short. Vash didn't seem to mind it at all! Though looking back I would have picked something that wasn't so dark. I don't think he could really see much. Oops. :)
First Disneyland ride!
Then we went on Pirates. Still fun. Didn't mind the hills. But it was passed feeding time and half way through he started crying. I felt super bad for the other people in the boat, but oh well. I was hoping he would just fall asleep, but that didn't happen until we were about to get off. Figures.
We were lucky enough to find Mickey on our way out of Disneyland! Vash didn't seem to care one way or the other. But I think he was eyeing that big nose to see how he could get it in his mouth. :) Also I was so grateful to find out the nice worker took some candid shots of his first introduction to Mickey. I had no idea she was taking those!
That pretty much sums up our first day. We left right after dinner since that baby hadn't napped all day!
We stayed at the Del Sol which is literally across the street from the entrance. And even better than that...it's right next to a Cold Stone. :) We decided to try out this carrier (I think Vash was too little when we tried it before and didn't like it much) to see if it was worth taking to the park. Vash LOVED IT!! WIN! And I'm pretty sure Dad loved carrying him even more.
My dad had bought Vash this Star Wars onsie their first day -and even picked up a 1st Vist button so we put that on him the next day.
See! I swear this kid smiles! He just gets so distracted by the camera he's always making that serious face!
So here is a little video I took of Vash in his carrier. I turned it sideways part way through, so sorry about that. :)
He liked It's a Small World with Grandma and Amy.
We also went on Snow White's Scary Adventure and Pinocchio that day. My friend Sarah and her family were actually at Disneyland too! We met up and were going to go on Small World together, but as soon as we got there and were about to get in line, Vash started fussing because he was hungry. :P Figures. I wasn't willing to risk having him crying for 15 minutes on the ride so we just headed back to the Baby Center and went on the ride later. It was fun to at least say hi! The next day we all headed out to Huntington Beach. Love that beach!
And Vash loved the beach too. Beach. Not ocean. He was all smiles and squeals! At least until we introduced him to the ocean.
We wanted to get Vash's toes wet in the ocean, but apparently the tide was dropping or the waves were just small because every time we set him down the water would never quite come up to reach his feet so we kept scooting up.
As demonstrated in the face below.
That just set him off and he could not be consoled. Seriously, he cried like he cries when he gets his shots. I felt bad, but geez. A little dramatic if you ask me. :)
We finally just took him back to the car to eat (since it was about that time anyway and I was not about to nurse on the beach). When we re-emerged he was happy again!
The last day at Disney Remy and I finally got to go on a few rides too. I had been to Disneyland twice while I was pregnant and was itchin' to finally get to ride the new Cars Land racers as well as my all time fave, Indy.
We had a really good time, the boy was good on the way home and we were actually able to shorten the drive home by an hour or so which was nice. As Remy put it, Disneyland is definitely a different monster with a baby. But still so fun!
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Newborn Pics
So as I had said, the plan was to have a birth photographer there for Vash's birth. I can't even describe to you how excited I was for that and how much those pictures meant to me...before they were even taken. Due to a series of unfortunate events, that just didn't happen.
I can't describe my disappointment.
Instead we did a newborn shoot at the house when Vash was just over a week old. We hired Tracy Layne (tracylaynephotography.com) and she did an awesome job! Here are some of my favorites!
I can't describe my disappointment.
Instead we did a newborn shoot at the house when Vash was just over a week old. We hired Tracy Layne (tracylaynephotography.com) and she did an awesome job! Here are some of my favorites!
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Happy BIRTHday Vash!
*I would like to say that I have been working on this for weeks! It's been way harder to find time to type up than I ever expected. :)
We are SOOOOOO excited our little guy is here! Here's the story of his arrival (minus everything I've forgotten due to lack of sleep and drugs):
March 25th was his due date. As I have mentioned in previous posts, I had been progressing on my own in the weeks before he was due, and I was NOT expecting to make it to his due date. Needless to say I was a little disappointed to have to go to my weekly Dr. appointment on the 25th.
My appointment was at 3:45 that Monday, March 25th. At that appointment I was dilated to a 4 and my Dr. was planning on stripping my membranes to hopefully jumpstart labor, but because I was group B positive, she couldn't. :( We set up to be induced the next week (April 1st) unless of course he came before then. Before we left I mentioned that even though I could count the "right" number of kicks in an hour, I felt like he was moving less overall. The Dr. sent us down to Labor & Delivery to be monitored. After being monitored for a while, the nurse talked with my Dr. and she said that there was enough irregularities in the baby's heart beat that if we wanted to stay and have a baby, we could.
I said yes, I wanted to stay.
Whoa.
It was weird because part of me knew that once my Dr. told me I should go down and be monitored, I wouldn't be going home. At the same time, I was surprised when it actually happened. The nurse gave us a few minutes to talk it over since I was sort of in shock. I hadn't wanted to be induced, like at all, and in some ways I couldn't figure out why I agreed to that. I think I didn't fully understand what I had just agreed to (which I know makes no sense), and I was also really anxious to have our baby come. Luckily it was my Dr. who was on call that night so she would be the one to deliver which made me happy.
So we gathered our stuff and the nurse walked us down the hall to the delivery room. As I laid down in the bed, the whole thing felt surreal. I couldn't believe I was really there and when I left, I'd have a baby!
At this point it was after 5pm and I hadn't eaten since lunch, so I was getting a bit hungry. I had always heard that you aren't allowed to eat once you get to the hospital, so I expected to be STARVING for a long time. Luckily, we had an AWESOME nurse who said she'd give us some time to get food before she started everything. SO NICE!
We got some Corner Bakery, ate up, and then she started me on antibiotics for the group B virus. A bit later came the Pitocin.
-Seriously though, as I continue, please note the whole night was a complete blur. I kept looking at the clock every time something happened, but I was so exhausted I can't remember. I hadn't slept since I went to bed Sunday night, and I didn't sleep more than a few minutes here and there during labor.
I'm pretty sure they broke my water around 10-10:30pm. I was really surprised at how fast the contractions became extremely painful. I thought I'd be able to last a bit longer without an epidural, but I knew I was going to have one anyway so there wasn't really a point to being in that much pain for longer than necessary. However, I was really afraid of the epidural. I don't know why specifically. I'm not afraid of needles or anything, but something about it scared the crap out of me so it was hard for me to make the decision to get it. The nurse put best when she said that when the fear of the next contraction is greater than the epidural, it's time.
And you know, it wasn't that bad. The most uncomfortable part was the fact that it numbed me up to my neck. It wasn't super numb, but I felt a little bit like I had just been at the dentist.
After the epidural kicked in, the nurse came back and put in some internal monitors for the baby's heartbeat and contractions. The resident Dr. had tried putting them in before, but she was having issues and it was REALLY painful. Though I wonder if it was just the Dr., because the nurse did it in like 2 seconds...
I was definitely more comfortable with the epidural, but I still wasn't able to sleep. Between the hourly checks and being too interested in watching the monitors, plus who really finds hospital beds comfortable, I just couldn't sleep. Despite that, MOST of the hours went by fairly quickly.
Now the exciting stuff.
After the Pitocin was started, the baby's heart rated dropped a bit. So the nurse came in and turned it off, waited a bit, then turned it back on at a lower dosage. Well, his heart rate still dropped. Again she turned it off, waited a while, then turned it back on. The same thing happened. I think this happened at least one more time. Our little guy just wasn't having it. And unfortunately, they had checked me twice and I had only dilated to a 5, MAYBE a 5+ they said. THAT was really disappointing for me and not what I was expecting at all.
Due to the baby's heart rate issues, they had turned off the Pitocin, but during each contraction his heart rate would drop. In looking at his patterns, they thought his cord might be clamped so they were going to add some fluid back in to hopefully let things float around and get out of the way. This is supposed to be super easy, no big deal. Well, as soon as the nurse turned on the fluids his heart rate dropped to 60.
I didn't realize what was happening at the moment. The nurse stayed so calm and just said she needed me to roll to my left side. Right about then the resident Dr. and another nurse came rushing in. I still didn't know that something bad was happening, so I was a little confused. The Dr. came over and was down talking to me saying things like "we'll need to watch your baby very closely." "If it doesn't go back up soon, we'll need to monitor you in the OR." Then she actually did call over to the OR to tell them we would be coming. That was when I realized whatever was happening was definitely not good and I started worrying. I mean, I had this room full (at least it felt full) of people who just suddenly appeared. The nurse actually didn't even have to call anyone in, the drop was so dramatic that the Dr.'s saw it on their monitors and came in on their own. Then they're telling me they are going to give me a shot in my butt to stop the contractions and that it might make me feel funny.
The only thing funny about it was that I kept waiting to feel the shot and I couldn't figure out why they were waiting so long and then I remembered that I was numb down there. :) The shot did make me really shaky kind of like a really bad fever and my teeth were chattering which I did not like. However I did love the heated blankets they kept bringing out for me. :)
Luckily my Dr. was at the hospital already for another patient so she came in and sat with me as they were watching the monitors. I didn't end up needing to go to the OR to be monitored right then which was good. I don't know how long they were there, but Remy said it was at least 30 minutes. At this point I think it was around 2:30am.
The baby's rate stabilized so the crowd left. The nurse thought the baby might be sunny side up so she had me roll as far as possible on my left side and put my leg up in a stirrup. It wasn't bad, but my arm started getting a little sore from laying on it. So the next time the nurse came in for my hourly check I asked her if I could roll to the other side. She said sure thing and started helping me roll over. Apparently that set off the baby again because I didn't even get all the way over and she made me go back because his heart rate started dropping.
I think I dozed off for a minute, I'm not sure how long because my Dr. came in the room after that and that's when she started talking to me about a C-section. I was definitely disappointed, but at the same time I knew I just had to do what I had to do. It wasn't worth waiting it out and potentially forcing an emergency situation.
At this point I think it was around 4-4:30am. Remy called the parents, and the birth photographer we had lined up to tell them the news. I know this is weird, but it wasn't until Remy called the photographer that I started getting emotional about the whole thing. Having those very first moments captured was something I was super excited about. And knowing I would be missing out on it really made me sad. But that's another story for another time.
The Dr.'s came back in the room, my epidural was beefed up, Remy got dressed for the OR and they whisked me away. I will say I am so thankful for the anesthesiologist for telling Remy to grab the camera!
The C-Section.
Was horrible.
Now I usually try to see the good side of everything. I really do. But I would be lying if I told you it wasn't that bad. It was.
I was numb up to my neck, my arms were tingling, I felt nauseous (if fact I puked for the first time the whole pregnancy in the OR as they were prepping), I was exhausted, cold, shaking, not to mention the actually surgery being totally uncomfortable. Describing how I felt physically is impossible.
But when I heard his first little cry I just couldn't believe it! It happened! He was here! I totally just cried. It was just amazing.
Vash Russell Smith was born March 26, 5:33am. 7lbs, 20 inches long!
When Remy brought him over, he was just beaming. I mean seriously, get me some sunglasses. And that little baby's face! He was so squishy and cute it was so hard not to be able to touch him.
After the delivery the surgery took a little longer than usual due to some extra bleeding. In fact at one point I was so tired of lying there I asked how much longer and the anesthesiologist was pretty funny. He said to my Dr. "Yeah can you make it quick, she has somewhere to be." It was pretty funny, and I realize the timing just depends on a bunch of variables, but boy was I over it.
Thinking back on it I realize that to sum it all up, I just didn't feel present.
Besides feeling like crap from the epidural, being up for 24 hours, etc., they had to give me an extra pain killer in the surgery that made me drowsy. I was so afraid of falling asleep. I mean, this was my child's BIRTH for crying out loud. I wasn't about to sleep through it.
When it was finally over and they moved me back in the bed (which was a totally weird experience in itself), they asked if I wanted to hold him. Well my freaking arms were numb so I couldn't. I couldn't for while actually, which also made me sad.
But with all the disappointment the C-section brought, I was SO happy to have a healthy baby!
I also absolutely LOVED my stay at the hospital. All the nurses and CNA's were SO awesome I can't even tell you. I would absolutely recommend delivering at IMC to everyone!
Vash, we are absolutely obsessed with you and love you SO much! You are more incredible than I even imagined.
We are SOOOOOO excited our little guy is here! Here's the story of his arrival (minus everything I've forgotten due to lack of sleep and drugs):
My appointment was at 3:45 that Monday, March 25th. At that appointment I was dilated to a 4 and my Dr. was planning on stripping my membranes to hopefully jumpstart labor, but because I was group B positive, she couldn't. :( We set up to be induced the next week (April 1st) unless of course he came before then. Before we left I mentioned that even though I could count the "right" number of kicks in an hour, I felt like he was moving less overall. The Dr. sent us down to Labor & Delivery to be monitored. After being monitored for a while, the nurse talked with my Dr. and she said that there was enough irregularities in the baby's heart beat that if we wanted to stay and have a baby, we could.
I said yes, I wanted to stay.
Whoa.
It was weird because part of me knew that once my Dr. told me I should go down and be monitored, I wouldn't be going home. At the same time, I was surprised when it actually happened. The nurse gave us a few minutes to talk it over since I was sort of in shock. I hadn't wanted to be induced, like at all, and in some ways I couldn't figure out why I agreed to that. I think I didn't fully understand what I had just agreed to (which I know makes no sense), and I was also really anxious to have our baby come. Luckily it was my Dr. who was on call that night so she would be the one to deliver which made me happy.
So we gathered our stuff and the nurse walked us down the hall to the delivery room. As I laid down in the bed, the whole thing felt surreal. I couldn't believe I was really there and when I left, I'd have a baby!
At this point it was after 5pm and I hadn't eaten since lunch, so I was getting a bit hungry. I had always heard that you aren't allowed to eat once you get to the hospital, so I expected to be STARVING for a long time. Luckily, we had an AWESOME nurse who said she'd give us some time to get food before she started everything. SO NICE!
We got some Corner Bakery, ate up, and then she started me on antibiotics for the group B virus. A bit later came the Pitocin.
-Seriously though, as I continue, please note the whole night was a complete blur. I kept looking at the clock every time something happened, but I was so exhausted I can't remember. I hadn't slept since I went to bed Sunday night, and I didn't sleep more than a few minutes here and there during labor.
I'm pretty sure they broke my water around 10-10:30pm. I was really surprised at how fast the contractions became extremely painful. I thought I'd be able to last a bit longer without an epidural, but I knew I was going to have one anyway so there wasn't really a point to being in that much pain for longer than necessary. However, I was really afraid of the epidural. I don't know why specifically. I'm not afraid of needles or anything, but something about it scared the crap out of me so it was hard for me to make the decision to get it. The nurse put best when she said that when the fear of the next contraction is greater than the epidural, it's time.
And you know, it wasn't that bad. The most uncomfortable part was the fact that it numbed me up to my neck. It wasn't super numb, but I felt a little bit like I had just been at the dentist.
After the epidural kicked in, the nurse came back and put in some internal monitors for the baby's heartbeat and contractions. The resident Dr. had tried putting them in before, but she was having issues and it was REALLY painful. Though I wonder if it was just the Dr., because the nurse did it in like 2 seconds...
I was definitely more comfortable with the epidural, but I still wasn't able to sleep. Between the hourly checks and being too interested in watching the monitors, plus who really finds hospital beds comfortable, I just couldn't sleep. Despite that, MOST of the hours went by fairly quickly.
Now the exciting stuff.
After the Pitocin was started, the baby's heart rated dropped a bit. So the nurse came in and turned it off, waited a bit, then turned it back on at a lower dosage. Well, his heart rate still dropped. Again she turned it off, waited a while, then turned it back on. The same thing happened. I think this happened at least one more time. Our little guy just wasn't having it. And unfortunately, they had checked me twice and I had only dilated to a 5, MAYBE a 5+ they said. THAT was really disappointing for me and not what I was expecting at all.
Due to the baby's heart rate issues, they had turned off the Pitocin, but during each contraction his heart rate would drop. In looking at his patterns, they thought his cord might be clamped so they were going to add some fluid back in to hopefully let things float around and get out of the way. This is supposed to be super easy, no big deal. Well, as soon as the nurse turned on the fluids his heart rate dropped to 60.
I didn't realize what was happening at the moment. The nurse stayed so calm and just said she needed me to roll to my left side. Right about then the resident Dr. and another nurse came rushing in. I still didn't know that something bad was happening, so I was a little confused. The Dr. came over and was down talking to me saying things like "we'll need to watch your baby very closely." "If it doesn't go back up soon, we'll need to monitor you in the OR." Then she actually did call over to the OR to tell them we would be coming. That was when I realized whatever was happening was definitely not good and I started worrying. I mean, I had this room full (at least it felt full) of people who just suddenly appeared. The nurse actually didn't even have to call anyone in, the drop was so dramatic that the Dr.'s saw it on their monitors and came in on their own. Then they're telling me they are going to give me a shot in my butt to stop the contractions and that it might make me feel funny.
The only thing funny about it was that I kept waiting to feel the shot and I couldn't figure out why they were waiting so long and then I remembered that I was numb down there. :) The shot did make me really shaky kind of like a really bad fever and my teeth were chattering which I did not like. However I did love the heated blankets they kept bringing out for me. :)
Luckily my Dr. was at the hospital already for another patient so she came in and sat with me as they were watching the monitors. I didn't end up needing to go to the OR to be monitored right then which was good. I don't know how long they were there, but Remy said it was at least 30 minutes. At this point I think it was around 2:30am.
The baby's rate stabilized so the crowd left. The nurse thought the baby might be sunny side up so she had me roll as far as possible on my left side and put my leg up in a stirrup. It wasn't bad, but my arm started getting a little sore from laying on it. So the next time the nurse came in for my hourly check I asked her if I could roll to the other side. She said sure thing and started helping me roll over. Apparently that set off the baby again because I didn't even get all the way over and she made me go back because his heart rate started dropping.
I think I dozed off for a minute, I'm not sure how long because my Dr. came in the room after that and that's when she started talking to me about a C-section. I was definitely disappointed, but at the same time I knew I just had to do what I had to do. It wasn't worth waiting it out and potentially forcing an emergency situation.
At this point I think it was around 4-4:30am. Remy called the parents, and the birth photographer we had lined up to tell them the news. I know this is weird, but it wasn't until Remy called the photographer that I started getting emotional about the whole thing. Having those very first moments captured was something I was super excited about. And knowing I would be missing out on it really made me sad. But that's another story for another time.
The Dr.'s came back in the room, my epidural was beefed up, Remy got dressed for the OR and they whisked me away. I will say I am so thankful for the anesthesiologist for telling Remy to grab the camera!
The C-Section.
Was horrible.
Now I usually try to see the good side of everything. I really do. But I would be lying if I told you it wasn't that bad. It was.
I was numb up to my neck, my arms were tingling, I felt nauseous (if fact I puked for the first time the whole pregnancy in the OR as they were prepping), I was exhausted, cold, shaking, not to mention the actually surgery being totally uncomfortable. Describing how I felt physically is impossible.
But when I heard his first little cry I just couldn't believe it! It happened! He was here! I totally just cried. It was just amazing.
Vash Russell Smith was born March 26, 5:33am. 7lbs, 20 inches long!
I was surprised at his cone head when I saw these pictures. I wasn't expecting that he would have one, but I guess he was in the birth canal long enough...by the time I saw him unwrapped it was gone.
When Remy brought him over, he was just beaming. I mean seriously, get me some sunglasses. And that little baby's face! He was so squishy and cute it was so hard not to be able to touch him.
(Do you see what I mean about the beaming?! His face is totally covered and you can see how happy he is!)
After the delivery the surgery took a little longer than usual due to some extra bleeding. In fact at one point I was so tired of lying there I asked how much longer and the anesthesiologist was pretty funny. He said to my Dr. "Yeah can you make it quick, she has somewhere to be." It was pretty funny, and I realize the timing just depends on a bunch of variables, but boy was I over it.
Thinking back on it I realize that to sum it all up, I just didn't feel present.
Besides feeling like crap from the epidural, being up for 24 hours, etc., they had to give me an extra pain killer in the surgery that made me drowsy. I was so afraid of falling asleep. I mean, this was my child's BIRTH for crying out loud. I wasn't about to sleep through it.
When it was finally over and they moved me back in the bed (which was a totally weird experience in itself), they asked if I wanted to hold him. Well my freaking arms were numb so I couldn't. I couldn't for while actually, which also made me sad.
But with all the disappointment the C-section brought, I was SO happy to have a healthy baby!
I also absolutely LOVED my stay at the hospital. All the nurses and CNA's were SO awesome I can't even tell you. I would absolutely recommend delivering at IMC to everyone!
Vash, we are absolutely obsessed with you and love you SO much! You are more incredible than I even imagined.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
The One Where I Rant @39 Weeks
So I'm at 39 weeks and 3 days!
39 weeks!
!!!!
We are over the moon anxious and excited to meet this little dude and are waiting as patiently as possible for his arrival.
Which is kind of difficult.
I was kinda hoping that yesterday, the first day of Spring, would be his birthday. Buuuuuut...no. However I did have my weekly appointment and I was at a 3+, at least 75% effaced (I forgot to ask for the updated number), and his head is at a -2 station! So, things are definitely moving along! I'm hoping this is a good sign that I won't go (at least too far) past the due date.
I was so confident that I wouldn't even get to my due date for a while...and as the days pass, I'm just praying I don't go a full week over and have to be induced! I know there are worse things, but there's something about inducing that I find very scary. I hadn't ever thought about it that much until now, and I don't want it! Obviously I don't really get a say in when he shows up so if I have to, then I have to.
On to what I really wanted to get off my chest.
As I've talked with people at church, and with family members over these last months, and random people who feel like sharing their 2 cents I've been overwhelmingly disappointed in people's attitudes regarding pregnancy, birth, and parenting. In fact, both Remy and I have. And I have a lot of thoughts about it. So I apologize if this is all over the place.
First off, here are some things I know and/or believe to be true about pregnancy, children, and parenting.
-I know our lives will be different when he gets here.
-I know we'll be tired.
-I know parenting will be hard at times.
-I believe it's worth it, otherwise why would people keep having kids?
-I believe both nature and nurture play a role in who children become.
-I know we won't be perfect parents and that we will make mistakes.
-I know that while all kids go through similar "stages" of growing up (saying NO, throwing tantrums, waking up in the night), every kid is different. You cannot assume they are all the same.
-I know my child will not be perfect and that I can't control everything he says and does, but I can do my best to teach him good qualities I hope he will develop.
And the biggest one:
-I know that I don't fully understand HOW things will change, HOW tired we might be, and HOW hard things can get, etc. until this little baby shows up and we experience it first hand.
With that said, here are some things I know that you DON'T know about my child/experience, but you claim to:
-You don't know that my experience is going to be the same as yours.
-You don't know the personality of my child -and neither do I, so quit assuming you do.
-You don't know that my kid will be crazy and wild ALL THE TIME just because yours is/was or you think that's how every kid HAS to be.
-You don't know how easy or hard my pregnancy has been, so please leave your bad attitude to yourself.
-You don't know my past experience with kids. Not claiming to be an expert, but you don't know me.
-You don't know how easy/hard it was for us to have this baby, so maybe there's a reason I'm keeping a positive attitude.
And again:
-You don't know my child yet, no one does. So please stop imposing all your assumptions on him. Let's just all wait and see what we get when he actually gets here.
Now I get drama can be fun. I do. I get that it's fun to talk about how horrible things can get. And how hard they are. And how fun it is to "know" something that someone else doesn't.
Get it.
It's like the theory that if you have a good experience somewhere, you tell one or two people. If you have a BAD experience somewhere, you tell 10 or more people.
Got it.
But folks, do you not remember when you were having your first baby? Were you not excited? I'm not denying it won't be hard. And I'm not denying the fact that I don't understand what that even really means until I experience it myself. But holy hell folks, do none of you like being a parent? Was none of your experience caring for your infant even remotely fun or fulfilling or brought you any sort of joy? Or do you just find it entertaining to just be that negative? The day Remy expressed how frustrated he was about the negativity (before I had even said anything), I was glad to know it wasn't just my hormones who had their feelings hurt.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm pretty sure none of these people hate being parents and probably do love their kids more than anything. But why the focus on everything that is bad?
I figured most people would say things like "it is the hardest/most exhausting/scariest thing I've ever done, but.....it was so worth it/it's the best thing that's ever happened/I love it/it's so fulfilling/I've never been happier..."pick one.
But no.
I sat at one of my baby showers literally stunned at the attitude of everyone there. -Especially considering WHO was there. I went home and cried actually. Maybe I'm just 100% clueless, but I'm pretty confident it's not THAT horrible ALL the time.
Two of my biggest issues are:
One: if you have an experience that I could learn something from, please share -in a constructive way. I still may not agree, or I may not even find myself in that situation at all, but you can give me all your "advice" and relay it in a way that acknowledges that every situation is different and what worked for you may not work for me. -Rather than assuming your experience is the only one I should expect for myself.
Two: our child is our child and was meant for us. You don't know his personality and you don't know our parenting philosophies and techniques. And heck, we don't really either for that matter until we get a chance to try it out. So please don't tell me that he's going to be some wild, crazy person because we were both (relatively) easy as a kids so that means I have to have a lunatic kid. Or because other kids' personalities "belong" or "should have been given" to someone else in your family because they somehow "deserve" a certain type of kid. I'm sorry that due to your complete lack of self awareness your kid is behaving in a way you don't want them to and you don't see the connection.
Yikes. That's pretty much it. I could go on, but I'll leave it here. Maybe it's my personality, or maybe I'm being overly sensitive, or maybe once I'm a member of this "mom club" I'll get it. But I hope that I won't feel like these people. That I'll be a part of the apparent minority that loves being a parent.
39 weeks!
!!!!
We are over the moon anxious and excited to meet this little dude and are waiting as patiently as possible for his arrival.
Which is kind of difficult.
I was kinda hoping that yesterday, the first day of Spring, would be his birthday. Buuuuuut...no. However I did have my weekly appointment and I was at a 3+, at least 75% effaced (I forgot to ask for the updated number), and his head is at a -2 station! So, things are definitely moving along! I'm hoping this is a good sign that I won't go (at least too far) past the due date.
I was so confident that I wouldn't even get to my due date for a while...and as the days pass, I'm just praying I don't go a full week over and have to be induced! I know there are worse things, but there's something about inducing that I find very scary. I hadn't ever thought about it that much until now, and I don't want it! Obviously I don't really get a say in when he shows up so if I have to, then I have to.
On to what I really wanted to get off my chest.
As I've talked with people at church, and with family members over these last months, and random people who feel like sharing their 2 cents I've been overwhelmingly disappointed in people's attitudes regarding pregnancy, birth, and parenting. In fact, both Remy and I have. And I have a lot of thoughts about it. So I apologize if this is all over the place.
First off, here are some things I know and/or believe to be true about pregnancy, children, and parenting.
-I know our lives will be different when he gets here.
-I know we'll be tired.
-I know parenting will be hard at times.
-I believe it's worth it, otherwise why would people keep having kids?
-I believe both nature and nurture play a role in who children become.
-I know we won't be perfect parents and that we will make mistakes.
-I know that while all kids go through similar "stages" of growing up (saying NO, throwing tantrums, waking up in the night), every kid is different. You cannot assume they are all the same.
-I know my child will not be perfect and that I can't control everything he says and does, but I can do my best to teach him good qualities I hope he will develop.
And the biggest one:
-I know that I don't fully understand HOW things will change, HOW tired we might be, and HOW hard things can get, etc. until this little baby shows up and we experience it first hand.
With that said, here are some things I know that you DON'T know about my child/experience, but you claim to:
-You don't know that my experience is going to be the same as yours.
-You don't know the personality of my child -and neither do I, so quit assuming you do.
-You don't know that my kid will be crazy and wild ALL THE TIME just because yours is/was or you think that's how every kid HAS to be.
-You don't know how easy or hard my pregnancy has been, so please leave your bad attitude to yourself.
-You don't know my past experience with kids. Not claiming to be an expert, but you don't know me.
-You don't know how easy/hard it was for us to have this baby, so maybe there's a reason I'm keeping a positive attitude.
And again:
-You don't know my child yet, no one does. So please stop imposing all your assumptions on him. Let's just all wait and see what we get when he actually gets here.
Now I get drama can be fun. I do. I get that it's fun to talk about how horrible things can get. And how hard they are. And how fun it is to "know" something that someone else doesn't.
Get it.
It's like the theory that if you have a good experience somewhere, you tell one or two people. If you have a BAD experience somewhere, you tell 10 or more people.
Got it.
But folks, do you not remember when you were having your first baby? Were you not excited? I'm not denying it won't be hard. And I'm not denying the fact that I don't understand what that even really means until I experience it myself. But holy hell folks, do none of you like being a parent? Was none of your experience caring for your infant even remotely fun or fulfilling or brought you any sort of joy? Or do you just find it entertaining to just be that negative? The day Remy expressed how frustrated he was about the negativity (before I had even said anything), I was glad to know it wasn't just my hormones who had their feelings hurt.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm pretty sure none of these people hate being parents and probably do love their kids more than anything. But why the focus on everything that is bad?
I figured most people would say things like "it is the hardest/most exhausting/scariest thing I've ever done, but.....it was so worth it/it's the best thing that's ever happened/I love it/it's so fulfilling/I've never been happier..."pick one.
But no.
I sat at one of my baby showers literally stunned at the attitude of everyone there. -Especially considering WHO was there. I went home and cried actually. Maybe I'm just 100% clueless, but I'm pretty confident it's not THAT horrible ALL the time.
Two of my biggest issues are:
One: if you have an experience that I could learn something from, please share -in a constructive way. I still may not agree, or I may not even find myself in that situation at all, but you can give me all your "advice" and relay it in a way that acknowledges that every situation is different and what worked for you may not work for me. -Rather than assuming your experience is the only one I should expect for myself.
Two: our child is our child and was meant for us. You don't know his personality and you don't know our parenting philosophies and techniques. And heck, we don't really either for that matter until we get a chance to try it out. So please don't tell me that he's going to be some wild, crazy person because we were both (relatively) easy as a kids so that means I have to have a lunatic kid. Or because other kids' personalities "belong" or "should have been given" to someone else in your family because they somehow "deserve" a certain type of kid. I'm sorry that due to your complete lack of self awareness your kid is behaving in a way you don't want them to and you don't see the connection.
Yikes. That's pretty much it. I could go on, but I'll leave it here. Maybe it's my personality, or maybe I'm being overly sensitive, or maybe once I'm a member of this "mom club" I'll get it. But I hope that I won't feel like these people. That I'll be a part of the apparent minority that loves being a parent.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Bud-weis-er
Except for finding out thousands of other people did too.
Thank you for making me feel better about myself.
30 Weeks at 33 Weeks
I haven't been very good at taking belly pics. I thought I was going to, but I just didn't. In some ways I'm sad, and in others not. I kind of wish I had been at least starting around 20 weeks. Because somewhere between weeks 24-26 I really popped out and it would have been cool to see that change. Oh well!
But here in all its fuzzy, cell phone glory, is week 30, documented for all to see.
Still feeling pretty dang good. I'm definitely getting tired more quickly now. It doesn't take nearly as much to make me tired. Luckily overall I'm still sleeping well. Some nights are better than others, but really it's been great.
We've had someone come in and work on some projects around the house, and having almost everything we own in the kitchen and middle of the living room is exhausting all on it's own. It makes everything that much harder when you feel like you have to go through a maze to get anywhere. There was one day there for a little while where literally the only place to sit without having to move stuff or climb over anything was the toilet.
But, I'm not complaining because these projects are making me so happy! Seriously, they are things we've both been wanting to do for a long time. We decided that we needed to get them done in order to make us want to live here longer which is probably for the best. Plus, it's going to be great for resale or at least to get some nice renters in here someday! I can't wait to post the whole thing!
When I came home today I saw they had finished the trim work in the nursery and I got a little teary-eyed I'm not going to lie. It's going to look AMAZING! We're getting the crib on Wednesday and we'll set it up on Saturday after the carpets get cleaned! Can't wait!
Monday, January 28, 2013
So What if Christmas is Over
Better late than never, right?
We had a good Christmas this year. Though I won't lie, I'm pretty excited to have a little one next year. Yeah he'll still be little and not know what's going on, but I'm still looking forward to it.
We decided to do our Christmas for each other on Christmas Eve morning since we'd be busy that night and all day on Christmas. I mean, you have to open presents in pajamas. It's just sort of a Christmas rule.
Okay so we did stockings first of course, and this has got to be my favorite series of pics. He was seriously was like a little kid who got the best gift ever.
So this was the "big one." He was pretty happy about this one too. Which always makes me feel good. :) He had seen it at the Fossil store a long time ago and mentioned that he wanted it. So I found it online and I kept wavering on whether or not I wanted to get it for him. I'm glad I just went for it!
My big gift that I was SOOOOO excited about was window tinting for my car! I've been wanting that ever since we got the thing and I can't wait to finally get it done. We keep waiting for it to be sunny, since tinting apparently does better when it can be in the sun for the first week or so. However, we haven't had such luck.
Christmas Eve night we went over to Remy's parent's house for our annual Christmas Eve dinner. Then after we decided that we'd participate one last time in the Dyreng kids' tradition of sleeping over at my sister's house and then going to our parent's in the morning.
I'm always amazed at how well we are able to balance both families (and extended families) on Christmas. Luckily our traditions don't overlap for the most part, which is always nice. Though next year I imagine will be a little bit more tricky.
Our 3rd anniversary is just 3 days after Christmas and we had a good time. We started out the day going out to breakfast at the Original Pancake House where we saw Jeff Hornacek and his family sitting just a few tables away. When we got home we were playing a game that Remy got for Christmas when the doorbell rang and there was a huge bouquet of roses. Remy had then put one blue rose right in the middle for our little guy. It was pretty sweet.
For dinner we had a certificate for Carver's we used. Man that place is delicious! Neither of us had ever been there, and if we had more money we'd probably go back more often. :) Seriously, it was good. We had a lamb chop appetizer, and each chop was served on it's own little bed of mashed potatoes and topped with a pico de gallo. Oh man was that good. Both of us loved our dinners and dessert was also amazing. We seriously would go back!
I had been wanting to go see Zoo Lights for years, but I never think about it at the right time. Remy was so sweet and remembered for me. :) So we bundled up and went and walked around. There weren't many animals to see, but I love Christmas lights so I enjoyed myself. And we were so lucky because it was really busy and we literally go the best parking spot in the whole lot! :)
Love you Remy! Thanks for such a fun day!
We had a good Christmas this year. Though I won't lie, I'm pretty excited to have a little one next year. Yeah he'll still be little and not know what's going on, but I'm still looking forward to it.
We decided to do our Christmas for each other on Christmas Eve morning since we'd be busy that night and all day on Christmas. I mean, you have to open presents in pajamas. It's just sort of a Christmas rule.
The loot!
Okay so we did stockings first of course, and this has got to be my favorite series of pics. He was seriously was like a little kid who got the best gift ever.
It was a one pound package of Reese's. Seriously, it might as well have been a winning lottery ticket!
This is how our cat spent the day...sitting on the heater vent.
So this was the "big one." He was pretty happy about this one too. Which always makes me feel good. :) He had seen it at the Fossil store a long time ago and mentioned that he wanted it. So I found it online and I kept wavering on whether or not I wanted to get it for him. I'm glad I just went for it!
I'm always amazed at how well we are able to balance both families (and extended families) on Christmas. Luckily our traditions don't overlap for the most part, which is always nice. Though next year I imagine will be a little bit more tricky.
Trying out my new camera from my parents.
Dyreng family
Our little niece Alissa was more than willing to help you open your presents. At first she would ask you if she could help you open it, then eventually she just started helping you regardless. :)
This was my view. :) This was about 28 weeks.
For dinner we had a certificate for Carver's we used. Man that place is delicious! Neither of us had ever been there, and if we had more money we'd probably go back more often. :) Seriously, it was good. We had a lamb chop appetizer, and each chop was served on it's own little bed of mashed potatoes and topped with a pico de gallo. Oh man was that good. Both of us loved our dinners and dessert was also amazing. We seriously would go back!
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